Friday, January 10, 2014

5 Games That Need To Come Out In 2014

2013 brought us a lot of fantastic games, most of which were triple AAA+ titles, making it one of the worst years to be a tree, a wallet, or a hungry stomach (kids eat too much anyway). In all the hustle and bustle of big budget titles, some awesome games promised to us fell out of the radar in a month and some were so vaguely teased we didn't know what to think. Here's 5 games that took their idle time in delays during 2013, and that developers wouldn't give me no matter how much money I threw at them:

5. Flipnote Studios 3D

The Tease: Flipnote Studios 3D is the sequel to the popular free DSi moving animation drawing tool app. Announced in a Direct back in April, the app was to be set for a Summer release. Then Summer came and past, the game received a 'TBD' release date with the on-line feature removed during the offensive Swapnote message fiasco, and was never mentioned again.

Why it needs to be released already: 8 Months. It's been eight flippin' months since Flipnote Studios 3D was first announced, and now its as if Nintendo is determined to bring this pregnancy of delays into its full-term. The game has been out in Japan since July, and the only localization hurtle encountered was the termination of the on-line mode Flipnote Gallery: Friends, and that was over months ago, so what in the flippin' birds is the hold-up? The game still has its official website, so it hasn't been canned for release so it's absolutely baffling why this hasn't come out already. (though looking again at the main page they still have the omitted on-line features listed, so it's possible they forgot this game even exits)

 Above: Kingdom Hearts 3 release date for the past 10 years.

4. A New Okami

The Tease: Also back in Arpil, Capcom posted a teaser on their Twitter page about an upcoming Okami announcement that they'll reveal the following week. Was it a new game? A remake??? A spin-off???? An iOS port just to mess with us???? Actually, it was just a Japan-only fan book with stickers. You know, even an iOS port seemed less of an insult. Granted, it wasn't meant to be for the U.S. fanbase, but where and why in the entire universe would you tease something like this?



Why it needs to be released already: Back when Okamiden was released, the Wii U wasn't even a word yet and the 3DS was labeled as a failure that made the Vita look good in comparison. 3 years later, and we have a console that's in a desperate need of new and exciting games, and a handheld that's just begging for a new Okami. If they can do it with a Wii Mote they can certainly do it with the Wii U pad or any touch screen for that matter (forget what I said that iOS port, Capcom, I know what you're thinking). If there's one game that shouldn't be snubbed from the annual tradition of releasing PS4/Xbone exclusive games it's a new Okami, and I'm pretty sure the PS4's controller screen pad won't do the game any justice. So come on already, Capcom, don't leave your Okami fanbase hanging like you did with your Mega Man Legends faithful.  

3. TWEWY 2 (The World Ends With You 2)

The Tease: In 2012, Square Enix set up a teaser site with a set timer counting down from 7 days that hinted of a sequel to the cult hit title TWEWY was in the making and that it was to be revealed within that week. It turned out to be nothing more than a port for the iPad, because Square Enix apparently feeds on the rage tears of its fanbase and unicorn blood, and assumed everyone wanted a half-ass sequel to FFIV. It wasn't until someone completed the iOS port that a hidden teaser to an actual TWEWY sequel was discovered, which pretty much proved Square Enix is terrible at teasing something. 
  I am so ready for this game! ...I think? 
Why it needs to be released already: We already know they're working on something, so let's get to the nitty-gritty: If they really, truly care about their TWEWY fanbase they would not make this iOS exclusive. Repeat: DO NOT make this an iOS exclusive. I've had it up to hear with games like All the Bravest, Kingdom Hearts Coded, and Final Fantasy Tactics S milking out as much money for a game that either plays exactly the same as it did before or is so dumbed down you'd swear Square Enix believes we're all dyslexic. If they want to release it on the iPad, so be it, but give the 3DS the TWEWY sequel it needs and what the fans had actually wanted in the first place when you strip teased something so irrelevant to anyone's time. 
2. Pokemon Ruby/Sapphire Remakes 
The Tease: Okay, I'm probably going to get groans for this, considering the onslaught of Ruby/Sapphire rumors claiming that X and Y were teasing Gen III remakes have made all your brains numb, but I couldn't let this one (or these two) slip out of the list. Besides the fact that Gens I-II have received remakes in order, Pokemon director Masuda has hinted at the possibility of the remakes being developed a few years back in a tweet, but never really followed up with anything later. And of course last year at this time, Gamefreak announced a big reveal to be shown via Nintendo Direct that ended up being Gen 6, forever breaking the tradition of remaking a Pokemon game then announcing a new gen.  
Why it needs to be released already: Because it's long overdue, that's why! Pokemon Emerald was one of the best Pokemon games ever made, period. All they have to do is take the Battle Frontier and Vs. Seeker from that game and incorporate it to the Ruby/Sapphire remakes, and viola', instant Game(s) of the Year. Most of the Pokemon that got a Megavolution in X/Y are available in Gen III, so it would make the game have a new modern feel to it for vets. Also, it would give them an excuse to re-distribute Jirachi, which would be just swell, because dammit, some of us have been waiting 10 years for them to distribute it again. 
1. The Next Metroid (Just Anything but Other M 2)
The Tease: During the gag reflex that was the VGX show last month, Reggie was asked whether a new Metroid was in development and responded with an ambiguous "Of-" as if to say "Of course", but quickly changed the subject (he was wearing a Metroid pin so either he's trollin' with everyone or just likes wearing Metroid pins).  
Why it needs to be released already: Whether the next Metroid is 2D, 3D, or 2.5D I don't care...just anything to brainbleach my memory of Other M. Granted, Other M had some genuine good moments (ergo, the battle with Ridley), the storyline on the other hand flipped the series outside down and lead to the dumbest excuse in Metroid history as to why you can't use your items or upgrade your suit: no you did not loss them, Commander Adam forbids you from using them until he says so. Not to mention the game boasted atrociously drawn-out cutscenes interrupting almost every fight scene, starring Samus Aran either whining about the Baby Metroid or Adam Malkovich, Adam Malkovich, ADAM MALKOVICH. The poor lady can't undress without the guy's orders to do so, and yet she wouldn't stop kissing his butt like he was the last Klondike bar in existence. 
 "Adam, I need to pee, permission to use restroom?" 
"Not until you go through a volcano without protective armor, you don't! Man up, b****!" 
It's been a four year hiatus since we got another Metroid, give us something different and less story driven. A TPS Metroid with a Mass Effect gameplay vibe would be interesting, or even a true 2D platformer, because we seriously haven't seen one of those since 2004. Give us something with a better lasting impression than *spoilers* Samus almost killing herself to get a freaking helmet of a dead Adam Malkovich. Please don't do that, and please give us a Metroid title this year.'ve already promised us Shaq Fu 2, so don't make it any harder for us and announce something worth our time. And if you're generous enough throw in another Star Fox, Pokemon Snap, and F-Zero while you're at it.

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